End of 2011

Getting nearer to the end, my mind is resetting itself getting ready for another beginning. Many things happened in year 2011. Now everything is flashing across the invisible screen in front of my eyes.
Got released from the prison of graduate school and jumped into a different engineering and sales field early this year. Transferred back to Malaysia in August leaving a place I'd lived for 8 years. Big changes moving to KL and not having the convenience of transportation like Seoul. Salary dropped fifty percent but could not complain because its a price to come home. Doubting if my job suits me. Doubting if I could afford a car (which I haven't bought). Doubting if I should try to venture into cosmetic field of my dream. So many doubts in 2011. But it has to come to an end.
For the beginning, I'm ready to make a beautiful year!

Babyblue

Today I found my babyblue brand used by some budget cosmetic company on a Watson sale brochure. It was heartbreaking! But this somehow reminded me to what I always wanted to do which is making and Branding my own cosmetic. Suddenly it hits me that I am not supposed to work as a salesperson. Every single nerves of mine is retaliating.
My dream is to write. My other dream is to have my own cosmetic brand. my another dream is to own a coffee shop and be a barista. All my dreams seems fun but my job is not. It is the same with what everybody is doing. It is not dreamy. Not ideal. I'm Giving myself another four years to study and get back into cosmetic.Maybe study herbs or ayuveda and implement the concept into my cosmetic in the future.hmm. Not sure about the success rate but I don't wanna live without trying.
Babyblue. Good bye.

Another day

Sitting at the last row of seats in the bus back home. Not going home straight today, going to the department store to change the jeans that I bought for his birthday. Being a girlfriend who got a boyfriend size wrong is ashamed. I donot know how I got it wrong. Perhaps I was distracted or confused with my brothers' sizes. Hmmm. Felt pretty bad for that mistake.


Anyway, my day at work is kind of calm today I have no idea if I made it that way or is it because my seniors didn't have any task for me. I admit that I went to hang out with friends because I only have vey few time left in Korea. I kind of just smile when my senior complained about his work load. Sorry, but I couldn't help. I am in the middle of quitting this company and entering the same one in a different country. Confusing! But things will be back on track soon. I just hope the work load there is appropriate because I don't think I can work like my senior here.

Transferred. On subway now. The journey is 31 minute on a container squeezing with the strangers. Simply unpleasant especially in summer. The odor of the sweat filled the air that I breath in, makes me wonder if I'm breathing in air or sweat. Disgusting? But that's unavoidable natural phenomena. Nature makes a lot of things, but one is to be contradict with the other. Yin and yang.
Writing a ridiculously freelance piece after getting off work, I noticed that today is just another day for a simple human being. Many people is having the same day as I do. A normal day.

I got to the department store and the place is closed for a day. But why today? Standing on a 9 cm heels, it hurts to walk around. However since I'm here, going to the vegetarian restaurant in the corner. It is called loving hut. Not that I am a vegetarian but my family is. Getting them some Korean cuisine in packets and cans, hoping that they would like the taste of Korean food. Walked out from the store with heavy plastic bag in my hand, I am putting another 2 kg of extra weight on my feet which are barely stable on the 9 cm heels. I regret I wore them, just to look a little slimmer in my skinny jeans.

Looking for the sport store that sells posture correcting support clothing. Walked with the extra weight on my vulnerable feet. The store is not there anymore. It is turned into some other store. Or is it I who forgot where it is? I have no idea.

In the subway again. This time on my way home. Pity my medium sized feet on the heels of cruelty. Fortunately there are many empty seats. I guess the next time i want to wear this heels and carry extra weight, I should lose some weight in advance.

My tortured little medium feet, finally one stop away from home. What a day! And it is no more than just another day.

Kahlua Milk

Caffeine addict,
even for an alcoholic drinks,
I choose the one that is fermented from coffee beans,
Kahlua.

Lactose addict,
having milk almost every morning,
even for an alcoholic drinks,
I choose the one the cocktail with milk in it,
Kahlua milk.

:P

H2O plus something else

It is such a gloomy day when h2o plus something else like chlorine or other stuff starts pouring from the blue curtain of earth. I am trying my best to describe the acid rain in a scientific and yet artistic way but it doesn't seem smart at all. Instead, very confusing. Perhaps the raindrops that fell on my head a while ago has penetrated through the fine pores of my skin and into my rain. I am blurred.
Waiting at the laundromat in Seoul this moment, to dry my clothes on this floody day. Writing my blog on iPhone. At this moment, eight years of my life here in Korea pass by in front of my eyes like a film. Wow! Eight years and I'm finally leaving. Part of me can't wait to go home but part of me is worrying. The 'me' that I know back home was 18 years old. I am 26. Unbelievable. It is not that age matters. Just that my life there has been taking a break for such a long time while people who lives there have been going on with their life there. Someone that was there, can be gone now. Some things changed. My grandfather who were there before i left, far gone into another world. My parents aged.
I still remember sitting in the car with my dad when he drove me to tuition center at night. It was like yesterday . At that moment, i was thinking of leaving the house to go study abroad while looking out from the car window as my dad drove. And now, here I am sitting at a laundromat in a country I came to further my study eight years ago wondering if I could adapt well back home.
Rain is not my favorite. But it is amazing how it pull me back into my memory and bring me back my inspiration to write.

A piece of my nostalgia on a day when h2o with impurities falls from the blue curtain on earth.